Dear Lili,

Wow! 22 years old. And here I am, an old man just turned 62. How time flies.

I think about you every day and wonder how you’re doing. And, as always, I hold out hope that one day I will see my beautiful daughter again.

Until then, you are always in my heart.

Love always,

Your Dad 

It occurred to me that you don’t know much about my childhood and younger years. So here is a PowerPoint that I made for my students. (Click on the link and then on the image on the next page.)



Real Courage


Dear Lili,

I knew I was going to lose before I went to family court. I never stood a chance against the Japanese “justice system.” But I fought for you nonetheless. For two and a half years. Just wanted you to know. 

Your Dad ❤


Dear Lili,

I hardly know what to say to you anymore sometimes. It’s been over eight and a half years since I started this blog for you, hoping that one day you would become old enough to understand on your own that the special love a father has for his daughter can never be broken, and that no matter what happens, no matter how many years pass by, those feelings remain, and will remain, until my very last days.

Christmas was always a special time for us. I don’t know what you remember about those times, but I remember everything. I pray with all my heart that you too will remember the happy times we shared, not only at Christmas time but every day that we spent together.

I don’t know why you haven’t contacted me yet. I put up this blog hoping one day you would stumble across it and reach out to me. But of course you must have seen it by now. How could you have not found this or my Facebook page by now? And yet, we remain apart.

Yes, I could have contacted you before now. I know more about you than you might imagine. And yet I have refrained out of respect for your privacy, and for other, more legal reasons that prevent me from doing so. Again, you may understand those reasons as well someday.

And so, another year passes, and another Christmas “letter in a  bottle.” Merry Christmas, my daughter.

You are always in my heart.

Your Dad ❤

Dear Lili,

So many years have passed since you last saw your Texas cousins in August 2003. Of course, they’re all young adults now like you. They all miss you and hope that they can see you again someday.

I thought you might like seeing what they look like now. You never met your youngest cousin Manon, who you’ll see on the bottom left.

Here are the “Then and Now” pictures. I hope you enjoy them!


Sarah Douglass, Dante, Athene, Lili, and Ariel
doing ballet at Uncle Peter’s house in Houston
August 2003

Ariel, Sarah Douglass, Dante (standing)
Manon, Athene (front)
Thanksgiving 2019


Love always,

Dad ❤ 


Dear Lili,

Today is Veterans Day. Both of your grandparents proudly served their country during World War II.


Daddy ❤

Lieutenant Gertrude Maire Kotz and Major Philip Del Vecchio,
stationed England during the war

Major Philip Del Vecchio (right) with brothers Dick and Val

Your grandparents on their wedding day

Your Nonnie, Lt. Gertrude Marie Kotz,
one of the first enlistees in the new Women’s Army Corps


Poppie (bottom right) with his crew

The Art of Life


“One side of the story is not the whole story. In fact, it’s rarely even half of the story.”

— Tony Del Vecchio


Brokedown Palace (Grateful Dead)

Fare you well my honey
Fare you well my only true one
All the birds that were singing
Have flown except you alone

Going to leave this broke-down palace
On my hands and my knees I will roll, roll, roll
Make myself a bed by the waterside
In my time, in my time, I will roll, roll, roll

In a bed, in a bed
By the waterside I will lay my head
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

River gonna take me
Sing me sweet and sleepy
Sing me sweet and sleepy
All the way back back home
It’s a far gone lullaby
Sung many years ago
Mama, mama, many worlds I’ve come
Since I first left home

Going home, going home
By the waterside I will rest my bones
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul

Going to plant a weeping willow
On the banks green edge it will grow, grow, grow
Sing a lullaby beside the water
Lovers come and go, the river roll, roll, roll

Fare you well, fare you well
I love you more than words can tell
Listen to the river sing sweet songs
To rock my soul